8 Terrible Mother's Day Gifts

Mum always says it doesn’t matter what you give her on Mother’s Day. She’ll love you no matter what. She’s just glad you thought of her. And she means it.

If you really want to put Mum’s love to the test, though, give her one of these absolutely Godawful gifts on Mother’s Day. Just don’t blame us if she rents out your old room and writes you out of the will.

(These are all real products on Catch that you should totally buy… just not for Mother’s Day.)

Colgate Plax Mouthwash 3-Pack - $6

The gift that says “Mum, I love you enough to tell you your breath stinks.”

Disturbing Nightmare Monkey - $16.99

What will Mum find the most terrifying about this gift? Its grotesque grinning stare? Its ominous crashing cymbals? Or the fact that her womb gave birth to someone so twisted they would give this gift to their own mother?

Autographed Predator Movie Poster - $5,475.99

Even in the unlikely event that Mum is a big fan of Jesse “The Body” Ventura, she’ll be absolutely grief-stricken thinking about all the other things you could have spent $5,475.99 on.

Jumbo Foil Confetti Bomb - $9.43

If your Mum gets nostalgic for those days when you were a kid tearing up the house, give her something to remember you by: a mess she’ll be picking out of the carpet for years to come.

Parenting for a Happier Home - $23.75

Look, we all have some issues with our parents, but Mother’s Day isn’t the time for a passive-aggressive accusation in gift form.

Mysterious Yet Boring Hardware Thing - $49.99

We call it a “Boat Trailer Hand Winch Stand Bow Support Mount Bracket”. Mum will call it “the worst Mother's Day gift ever.”

2 Live Crew - As Nasty As They Wanna Be CD - $25.36

Hey, Mum was cool once. Maybe, long ago, she “got jiggy” to the X-rated party jams of notorious Miami sleaze merchants 2 Live Crew. But if she did, she doesn’t want to relive it with you, and you don’t want to know about it.