If I Were The Boss of You: A Southern Woman's Guide to the Sweet Life

"Always bet on a smart, older woman. We rarely pick a fight we can't win."

If I Were The Boss of You contains charming reflections, funny observations, and nagging worries we all share about our day-to-day existence. Who we are, what's important to us, and the small choices we make every day determine the course of our lives. Thompson utilizes her own brand of self-deprecating humor to ponder age-old, big-life questions. "A Chromosomal Point of View," "The Fake Eulogy," and "A Smack Down by Jesus" will make you laugh out loud. "Tiny Indignities" will make you cry. "Angels and Aliens" will keep you up in the wee hours wondering what will become of us. No Southern nostalgia, magnolias and moonlight, or voodoo queens here. This is a twenty-first-century, bossy Southern woman's take on real life.

Publisher: Koehler Books

Published: 24 January 2020

Format: Hardback, 244 pages

Age Range: 0+

Dimensions: 22.9 x 15.2 x 1.8 centimeters (0.53 kg)

Writer: Melinda Rainey Thompson

About the AuthorMelinda Rainey Thompson is the best-selling author of SWAG: Southern Women Aging Gracefully, The SWAG Life, I've Had It Up To Here With Teenagers, and I Love You-Now Hush. This Southern writer, humorist, and mother of three has been a staple on the ladies-who-lunch speaking circuit for the past decade. She teaches writing at Birmingham-Southern College, freelances for magazines, and speaks to all manner of gala, conference, fundraiser, luncheon, and dinner attendees around the country. She sees herself as a spokesperson for her people: women, mothers, Southerners, and writers of every genre from grocery lists to Great American Novels.

Reviews"This writer's authentic voice reminds me of all the Southern women I have known and loved." --Winston Groom, author of Forrest Gump"Melinda Rainey Thompson writes with dazzling wit, thoughtful insight, and a deep wisdom that we need more than ever these days. You don't want to miss this jewel of a book!"--Cassandra King Conroy, bestselling author of
The Sunday Wife, The Same Sweet Girls, and Tell Me a Story"[This is] a beautiful baby of a book that is destined to keep you up all night . . . . Debra and I stayed up the first night reading and laughing out loud and reading and laughing. . . . This is the best stuff we've read of its kind since we first fell in love with the writings of Fannie Flagg, Rheta Grimsley Johnson, and a host of other favorites. The wit is refreshing and needed, especially in these politically charged times when everyone's favorite pastime is spewing their spirited opinions upon the masses." --Charles Ghigna, poet and author"Melinda Rainey Thompson has an uncanny way of telling stories about seemingly ordinary events to remind us all of our shared humanity. Humorous, authentic, thought-provoking, and delightful." --Westina Matthews, author of Dancing from the Inside Out: Grace-Filled Reflections on Growing Older"Would it really be so difficult for Justin Bieber to sing 'If I were your boyfriend?' Sigh, probably. Yet just when it seems the last cornice of our culture has rotted off and crashed to the foundation of Western Civilization, here comes Melinda Rainey Thompson to prove it's possible to be snort-out-loud funny, erudite, and a true defender of the faith (with proper grammar, to boot). Hurray for MRT!" -- Commander Morgan Murphy, author of Bourbon and Bacon and owner of Shipvictory.com"Melinda Thompson's new book If I Were The Boss of You presents a problem: How do you describe it? Philosophy? Plato, Socrates and Aristotle could learn life lessons from Melinda; Manners? Following this book's advice will make the reader appear to be a Southern lady regardless of her beginnings; Humor? Probably the best choice--but only if you're really, really extra smart." --Jake Reiss, The Alabama Booksmith"I think we're ready for a book that delves into the mysteries of the Southern Woman of the 21st Century, but I'm not sure we're all ready for Melinda Rainey Thompson. She is standing a little too close for comfort, telling the truth in a way that is challenging without being confrontational, vulnerable without asking for sympathy. This is a fun book, but not 'light reading.' Like every sermon I've ever tried to preach, this book made me laugh, and cry, and think."--The Rt. Rev. Kee Sloan, Bishop of the Episcopal Diocese of Alabama"Don't let Melinda Thompson's reputation as a humorist fool you. If I Were The Boss of You is funny, very funny but if you're not careful she'll smack you in the face. . . . Thompson captures the insanity (and hilarity) of daily extant causing you to face mortality, smelly babies, piracy, leaky memories, anticipation, and even dread. I faced it all and came out the other side a happier man." --Lee Hurley, Publisher, WHY Media"Melinda Rainey Thompson is a 21st century Erma Bombeck, with loads of Southern Charm, wit and sass thrown in for good measure." -Alec Harvey, features writer and former president of the Society for Features Journalism